For kid memories, before I forget.

Memorial Day weekend spend the night at Mom’s house.  Clifton has been talking about “Pop Pop” for awhile and a lot over the weekend.  I don’t know if this is his generic name for all grandfathers or if he is really channeling Dad.  Sunday morning and we are playing the piano together.  Lovely actually.  Not harsh and scolding like so many of our other activities feel – lots of no no nos.  I quit trying to teach him chopsticks and start playing the bass line for heart and soul.  He is gently picking out high notes and it just sounds right with what I’m playing.

He picks up the brass plaque with Dad’s picture on it – the one that got made with the big plaque that hangs in the Iberville Parish Museum.  It was intended to go on Dad’s crypt, but still lives on the piano.  He’s saying things like Pop Pop told him to play this song; Pop Pop likes the piano.  Then he asks about Dad, is he dead, how did he die, and a wave of sadness engulfs his little 5 year old body.  He slumps against me and looks up sad that he never got to see him, he doesn’t know where he is. And so now I’m crying and trying to talk about where your spirit goes and where your body goes.  And he wants to go to the cemetery.

Arthur provides the comic relief, unintentionally as always.  When I ask him if he wants to go to the cemetery he says no, lays down under a book and reaches his arm up as if zombie coming out of the grave.  I done tole him to quit checking those zombie books out of the school library!  When we all get to the cemetery, Arthur asks where all the plusses are. (crosses).  I just love his straightforward precious brain.

Clifton wants to gather flowers and put them on any grave that doesn’t have some.  Love his generous inclusive spirit. They are not freaked out by the mausoleum where we look for Dad’s name or the graves outside with all the flags.  We go to find my grandparents at the city cemetery (picked a magnolia flower to leave there, ssshhhh) and I’m relieved that Clifton doesn’t ask me about my other sister buried there.  Enough sad thoughts for the day.  Arthur is still watching Scooby Doo in the car for this one.  Could have stopped by one more in White Castle, but it’s 7:00 already and time to go home.

Visiting family cemeteries with little kids makes my heart heave and glow.